A million things have happened over the past two months and it feels like eternity. I have done so many things in such a short span of time, but the only thing that I haven't been quite able to do is to think.
I mean if you're talking about thinking bout things that have happened (especially the bad ones), well of course I've been thinking about it every chance I get. I'd snap myself out of it when I start fuming, or start ripping the pen that I've been writing with apart.
It is difficult to think of the good stuff when your bosses have stuffed you with work from the neck up. They have kept their promise to keep me barely alive after I returned from leave. It wasn't like I took leave to go to Maldives and walk on the beach and pick seashells ok.
I've probably changed from it all, but I'm still me. Even when some think that I'm selfish or being condescending and unreasonable and all that. But what is life if you don't get to enjoy it, basing it only upon what others do for you or otherwise? I mean damn, we'd never be happy if we were sitting around waiting for SOME guy to make us happy.
But what I've learnt, even how strong we say we are, we do need someone. Or at least I needed. But an indescretion proved that I could make it through on my own (yes, while pining for some knight in shining armour to take away the pain). As for you guys who believe in fairy tales, sorry to burst your little bubble, there isn't one. There never has been one, and there never will be. Well ok that's a bit harsh. Maybe in the beginning of some 'love at first sight' and 'head over heels' kind of nonsense, you may think that there is. Now I know there really isn't. You make your own fairytale happy ending in your head and it doesn't happen. So there, no more fairytale. Easy peasy.
Though I think the fault lies in the worldly interpretation of love. They keep showing us movies of how perfect a man can be and how exciting it is to see that hunky guy and that pretty lady gets to click with him yada yada yada. And then they get married and then the movie ends. Then we all go ga-ga over the movie and say we want a marriage like that. HELLO???? the movie ended. They'd probably end up yelling at each other every night cause the girl likes the curtains all flowery and the guy doesn't.
So someone had the most intelligent mind to tell me that love was overrated. He said that true love was by doing the right thing, even if it was a routine, even if you didn't want to do it. The world has closed our eyes on the 'right' and gave us false hopes and promises in exchange. It is sad, because I finally understood what he meant. I never saw things that way.
But when I thought about all the wrong things that I've done in the past, it wasn't that I didn't love. It was because I was stupid for not listening to the better judgement, thinking that my own way was the right one. And really guys, if anyone were to tell you to do something just because, it's not worth it.
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Love is an undying process. For many, this process seems too much, too long or too difficult to finish. Once someone decided to kill the process, they kill love, and in a way, they also killed part of themselves because they had forced love out of them.
ReplyDeleteNo doubt there are a lot of things which we don't like in this process and that everyday we were so dreadful about it, we gave ourselves excuses to do it. We may do it to avoid complications, arguments; We may do it to pleases the other half; we may even do it just because we think that we have to do it. But subconciously, the only reason we will do it is because we loved that person.
It's only love that you wish to avoid confrontations. Its only love that made you want to pleases someone. No doubt there are a lot of people going to dispute this; but when all actions are backed up by love and affection, somehow, the process seems not as bad as the first sight. People always talks about sacrifices in relationships. Whether or not you have to stop smoking because your other part hates it or stops playing your PS3 for 8 hours a day because your gf/bf nags you like hell; its just shows that you are willing to trade your likings with the love and affection you received.
It is indeed very strange that when you are madly in love, nothing else matters more than your partner. One should always remember how mad he or she was, as it reminds them how love is suppose to be.
Love, as it turns out, is not difficult, its just your perception as to what love means..
"It is indeed very strange that when you are madly in love, nothing else matters more than your partner. One should always remember how mad he or she was, as it reminds them how love is suppose to be. "
ReplyDelete~~ To quote from the above; remembering it as memories is totally different from living in it in the begining. And to remember to live as when you are madly in love in the begining, it's different.